Mentorship refers to a developmental relationship in which a more experienced person helps a less experienced person, referred to as a protégé  apprentice, or mentee, develop in a specified capacity.

I believe that most people want to be led, and that if they are being led in a way that increases or improves their reality for the better, that they will willingly follow.

Mentorship can be the fastest and most accessible shortcut to success in anything. A mentor can help you avoid whatever may slow you down or waste your time. A mentor can show you the best direction and encourage you to get there sooner.

A mentor may also help you with his own connections, opening doors you couldn’t open on your own. And most of all, a mentor can tell you about his own mistakes so you don’t need to repeat them.

Nobody learns how to judge value in school. Your family didn’t teach you that either.

It’s very important to have a good sense of value to detect opportunities. If you can see through the surface (appearance, cash) you may find out that a person can give you opportunities, opening doors, sharing contacts, finding jobs or projects, helping you make money and/or have fun.

Who should have more value to you? Someone that can give you one thousand dollars, or someone that can show you how you can make ten thousand? It is obvious but most people will choose the former and ignore the later.

Social hubs tend to become power brokers.

Connections are a very powerful and desirable currency. Connections open doors that you can’t open with just money or hard work. Having the right connections can speed up projects, provide solutions for nearly impossible problems. Connections are one of the most elusive and volatile of all things to keep, but also one of the most valuable, if you have the right ones.

Being a social hub, hosting your own parties, you can also open and talk to everyone there. You will have the chance so isolate everyone, and every approach will be a warm approach automagically.

When people know that you are a great source of contacts, specially influential ones. You socialize and meet with influential people frequently. By virtue of the number and quality of your own social network you can act as a powerful problem solver, and those that know you recognize that.

One example:

I know several social hubs, but one I like to use as an example is a friend who used to be a State Representative and knows an incredible number of people of importance involved in politics and big business in the state, plus he has an equally impressive number of well placed contacts in Washington DC and New York City. He is a man that can make incredible things happen with a few phone calls, or a nice conversation over dinner, or at the golf club.

My way of becoming a social hub was by throwing parties at my place, hosting events and parties there, and letting other people use my space for their own parties. It worked like a charm. I was soon involved in more social circles than I cold digest, and I had the change to connect to everyone at blazing speeds. Combined that with my way to gaming with a girl along the results were excellent.

For networking you should find a way to be close to that person or, if time allows, become part of the environment by making friendship with his/her friends, becoming a friend or offering something of value to that person’s life, rather than just coming to ask for some favor or business. Network connections created on a basis of friendship and personal admiration will last longer and there is only one way to make friends: Be a friend first.

The best way to build connections is by being helpful to others. To make friends you first have to be a friend. If you try to approach hustling and selling people will keep some distance or avoid you outright.

First of all I want to shamelessly quote from FastSeduction FAQ:

Q: “There’s this one woman (I’ve been chasing for X days/months/years)… how do I get her to [like / love / sleep with me]?”

A: This is called “one-itis”. An AFC who doesn’t realize he’s an AFC (Average Frustrated Chump) will never understand why nobody can answer this question for him or why he will never be able to get this woman with his current mindset. First, you have to realize that if you’re thinking this way, you will always be an AFC and will almost always fail with women (you’re only sucesses coming from luck – hence, the term “getting lucky” which is used often by AFC types). Here’s why you can’t win over this woman: you don’t yet know how to go out and get 10 more desirable women in a short amount of time. If you DID know how to do that, you would not be obsessed with getting this one woman and you would already know how to answer your own question. Why? Think about it. If you could go out and have 10 (or more) women who are smarter, nicer, more beautiful, and more exciting than the one you are obsessing about, how important do you think she would be to you? You see, you can’t just go from being an AFC to PUA (Pick-up Artist) without a certain understanding. You have to first admit to yourself that you’re an AFC and get into recovery mode, becoming an RAFC (Recovering AFC). Learn to stop thinking like an AFC and the road to becoming a PUA will be clear. Once that road is clear, you will begin to understand the answer to this question. The reason this question is so difficult for an AFC to grasp is that truly understanding the answer is an epiphany.

[jetman coined one-itis, one of the most problematic symptoms of AFCs]

I faced this exact dilemma once more recently. Don’t read me wrong: I got rid of one-itis a long time ago, but occasionally a new girl comes along who is so far above average, with such high value to me, that I may have a relapse. So this time it was with a girl that off my list of most desirable characteristics a woman can have, a list with some 16 items on it she checked on just about… 14! That was way too close to my definition of an ideal woman for me, but she wasn’t as interested in me as I was interested in her. The result: I had for two days a case of one-itis! Here is the solution I found:

By the end of the second day I called another girl that I have been seeing for more than a year. She is a very good friend, one of the true sexually submissive women that I have found, and very fun to talk to and be with. So I arranged to meet with her at my place and we had a great session of sex, drinks, and fun talk, in that exact order. Then I got a Montecristo and a bottle of Malbec and went to the rooftop of my building. It was about 45 degrees outside and by the end of it I was shaking with cold, but didn’t stop until the end. I smoked the entire cigar and drank all the wine while saying outlout every little think, no matter how small or overlooked, that I didn’t like about her. In the middle I added phrases like “She is a Troyan Horse, sent to screw up my mind.”, and “She is very good, but there are others out there that are even better.” and other phrases to help me get a grip of myself.

Talking aloud makes your uncontious mind listen to it. I asked myself what would Style do? What would Joshua do if he was in my place? What would DeAngelo do? I questioned my motivations, I questioned her age (an important factor for me), and I questioned the wisdom of getting involved with someone that lives right on the other side of the country.

After all that I smelled like a cigar bar, was drunk, and literally felt the previously uncontrollable desire for her drained out of my body. She became a normal human being in my eyes and I could then see her problems, as well as her virtues, not through the goggles of passion but for what it is really worth.

In some cases it makes sense to go out in the world in person and expose yourself. A professional that visits a trade show, for instance, is doing just that. A promoter that visits a nightclub and introduces himself to people is doing the same. A book author showing up for a book signing is doing the same.

Just make sure that, when choosing an event to participate, that you take into consideration all the costs, financial and otherwise, and compare them to the option of sticking to your online game.

At what places you should be showing up?

Only those places that are focused on the specific area of interest of yours, where people gather to socialize and/or make business, where you can learn from others and/or give them value by teaching them something.

Make sure to use different web sites, different email addresses and, sometimes, even different names for profiles that have different purposes. Artists have stage names, writers have pen names, you can choose different nick names or “handles” to use accordingly.

In my case I have a web site and email address with my name. It is for very general purposes and serves as an anchor, a place online where people can find me over time and that never changes. Then I have this blog which exposes a specific view of who I am and what I am about. I also have other web sites for different professional activities.

There is no reason you should have just one web site. Actually the more advanced your online game becomes the more internet resources you are going to use.

If you have profiles online or your own web sites or blogs, you will get an email from that person interested in talking to you. In general I advise against posting phone numbers because you get all kinds of time-wasting phone calls. If someone responds an email there are several advantages: The person has to organize some thoughts and express what he/she is looking for. You can respond at your own pace while a phone call may interrupt you anytime and anywhere. If the email seems idiotic or a waste of time right off the bat you can just delete it and not waste any more time.

Who is more likely to find you?

I have online profiles related to my interests, lifestyle and sexual preferences. Those that share the same preferences and are curious or engaged in similar interests are most likely to find me than anyone else.

When they are using search engines or browsing social networks that I participate on, looking for people with the same interests as they have, they will find me there.

Equally important is that the general public will not find me. If you create a profile or web site that is too general wither it will suck and not attract anyone, or it will attract too many and you will waste a great amount of time trying to find good contacts in the middle of it.