Archive for the ‘Internet’ Category

Tell me something useful…

Sunday, April 19th, 2009

“Hi, my name is Cindy, and I’m 24 years old, and my favorite color is pink.”

Well, cindy4fun24… from your basic profile information, we’ve already been able to gather that information. Do you have anything useful to share?

womancomputerMany people on social networking or dating websites fall into the habit of listing arbitrary information that is supposed to give an idea of who they are. Even if someone did falsely assume that they could get to know you by reading a few short paragraphs of supposed “autobiography,” what good will it do to repeat basic information that is already listed? What good does knowing your favorite color do for me?

Listing information like this is not only a waste of time for the author, but also for the person perusing the profile. Much of this information could be obtained simply by having a conversation with someone. Your favorite color or the TV shows you watch tell very little about who you are, anyway.

Instead of playing it safe by filling the space of an “About Me” section with useless information, people should learn to say things that actually will help them meet people they will be compatible with.

If you’re looking for someone who is a non-smoker… say so. If you need to find someone who is into kinky sex…put that in your profile.

Listing things like this that explain what you’re looking for, or why you’ve created the profile at all, will yield much better results. You will attract people who are truly potential matches, and avoid dealing with people who wouldn’t really interest you.

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Be congruent

Saturday, February 14th, 2009

Make sure to use different web sites, different email addresses and, sometimes, even different names for profiles that have different purposes. Artists have stage names, writers have pen names, you can choose different nick names or “handles” to use accordingly.

In my case I have a web site and email address with my name. It is for very general purposes and serves as an anchor, a place online where people can find me over time and that never changes. Then I have this blog which exposes a specific view of who I am and what I am about. I also have other web sites for different professional activities.

There is no reason you should have just one web site. Actually the more advanced your online game becomes the more internet resources you are going to use.

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Where to have profiles online?

Tuesday, January 13th, 2009

With your interests in mind, check all social networks, dating web sites, professional listings, and any other social resource you can find online that serves the purpose of connecting people with the same interests as yours. Very specialized sites are great, but even if you use them you should also participate in at least one other “just social” network and one for business/connection purposes.

I don’t use eHarmony.com or any other dating web site intensely geared towards monogamous relationships, but maybe you should. Dating web sites for alternative lifestyles are the best for me. But even regular dating web sites are fine as long as you post on your profile a conspicuous disclaimer telling the truth.

Even on dating sites where non-monogamous relationships are common or expected I like to say this:

“The fact that I am here looking for women doesn’t mean I don’t have any. So I am in no hurry and will focus on quality rather than quantity.”

Here are some of the web sites I used in the past and/or present:

SeekingArrangement.com
FetLife.com

I also use some social networks:

FaceBook.com
ASmallWorld.net
CouchSurfing.org

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