One night after a particularly rough sex section, we were talking about fantasies and how we liked sex in creative and advanced ways, and we began listing things we have done and things we would like to do. She had a notepad and a pen near her bed. She took it and began a list. First e made a list of all things sexual we have done already. Our lists made a bout a page each and we not too dissimilar. But when we started listing what we haven’t tried yet that list was long! We tried to remember everything we ever saw in movies, ever heard of from friends and acquaintances, and anything else that came to mind that night. The only limits we set were “no kids, no animals, and safe sex”. We listed both things we have never experienced and thought we would like, and also things we didn’t experience and were not sure at all if we would like. We crossed out things we were absolutely sure we didn’t want to try, so I had an opportunity to cross out “having sex with another man”, and we crossed out most, but not all, of the more extreme kinky stuff that sounded totally disgusting for both of us.
At this point the question was already in the air and someone had to say it, so I said it first:
“Let’s try it all!”
“Twice.” – she replied. – “Because to be sure you don’t like something you need to try at least twice.”
It was like laying out the menu of all (not all but most) the sexual practices known to us and deciding to try everything that we could handle. The intention was to find out where were the limits of our personal interests and tolerances.
During the next 6 weeks we had slow romantic sex and very rough sex, tried all types of things in BDSM, had sex in public places, got caught doing it. We had sex in front of other people and watched others doing it. Had threesomes with other girls and other men as well. We had sex together, over the phone, with and without clothes. We went to swinger clubs, kinky clubs, peep shows, strip clubs, and spent hundreds of dollars at the sex shops buying all sorts of toys and novelties, and we tried them all. We had sex at home, restaurants, our cars, public parks, clubs, other people’s homes, dungeons, abandoned buildings, roadside gas stations, rooftops, elevators, balconies, cheap motels, libraries, tents, a jacuzzi, the bathtub, the kitchen, and a toolshed.
When we liked something we marked it done. When we didn’t like it we tried it again, then marked it done. It was exhausting and was only possible because our thirst for knowledge and our curiosity were larger than our physical exhaustion and the logistical challenges we faced.
The result is that we pretty much “mapped†the territory of our sexual interests, and in doing so we discovered the latitude of our interests was significantly bigger than we thought before. In my feelings Bridget was like my soul mate, the one who was my partner in a journey of self discovery that, even though individual in nature, took a partner to make it possible. What a privilege it was to have such good company along the way. She was sexy, understanding, patient, enthusiastic, and friendly at all times. Even though our lives just crossed paths for that short period, I can definitely say it was one of the best times of my life, and I know whoever is at her side today must be a very happy man (or woman).
